Shingeki no Gakuen Alice
by Prose Vanity
Summary: Everything goes awry when the trainees of the 104th squad accidentally latch on to Noda as he returns to present-day GA dimensions. At least Noda finds out he can teleport between worlds, and hey, it can't be bad, the titans are far away now, and for once Eren and the others feel safe, right? WRONG. Never count Alices out of the equation. Drabbles. And crack. And OOC. And... heh.
1. Natsume

_Ashynote _I have no idea where my life leads to any more. Don't expect any kind of sheer brilliance, because this was written while I was high on caffeine. To give you an idea, I don't ever want to reread this and run through its grammar and plot, because NO. Just _**NO**_.

* * *

**Shingeki no Gakuen Alice (Attack on Gakuen** **Alice)**

_which, now that I come to think of it, should also be known as_

**Ashy on Crack**

-;-

Natsume, despite his covertness about it, actually feared Hotaru Imai. Who wouldn't? She was cunning and _too smart_ and had the technology that could give the Interpol a run for their money. She was _made_ to be feared, she was the kind of human (such description debatable) who just couldn't have been made for anything else other than terrorising people and earning mounds of money and respect and admiration while she was at it.

Simply put, Hotaru Imai was _badass. _So badass that even Natsume, the king of badassery himself, actually acknowledged and feared and hated her for it. And he never thought he'd feel the same about any other woman.

And then came the day Noda returned from another random teleportation blackout.

It was a fairly uneventful day, really. Classes were boring as usual. Perhaps it was a little out-of-character for him to endure Narumi's literature class (Romeo and Juliet, how ridiculously cliché) but the weather outside was bright and sunny and hot that staying indoors and sleeping through hours and hours of pointless academics suited him just fine. It was even a little fun, given that Polka Dots was being so much more idiotic than her usual self, having completely over-rationalised and missed the tragedy and extreme hilarity of the circumstances Romeo and Juliet were put through (the girl thought it was sweet, but that Romeo should have just talked to his father and clarified things and done everything in a more diplomatic way, which to Natsume sounded a tad bit too overbearing and irrelevant to the actual story). Occasionally Narumi would twirl around and recite lines from the play with so much inflection and histrionics it _hurt_ to even just hear his voice, but as the air-conditioned classrooms felt so comfortable and Mikan was so immersed in the discussion, he felt just fine. Even Ruka, more annoyed at Narumi lately than any of them combined (long story short, Narumi asked Ruka to "kindly recite to us the most poetic verses you ever spoke to Piyo"), opted to remain indoors.

He tried his best to tune out Narumi's natterings, but that was clearly ever so pointless.

"'_What's in a name-_' Oh! Nodacchi! And... who might you guys be?"

Now, having been trained in the Dangerous Abilities gave you so many sensory perks, like being able to immediately sense the change in a crowd's atmosphere and being able to read tension like it was a word that floated in midair when intensified. This tension was the kind which just exploded into Natsume's mind, and he lifts his head from his arms and gets met with the sight of nine people looking immensely surprised and _bloody_ standing in front of the class. Noda, the renowned escapee from the Special Abilities, was in the middle of the motley of people, looking only mildly interested in the proceedings.

"I'm back," he said, scratching his head absently. "I may have brought a few guests from the dimension I traveled to, Narumi-sensei, I hope you don't mind." He gestured towards the eight kids, all around their age, who still clung to his shirt and pants. One appeared to be eating baked potatoes, the other looking around so calmly it unnerved him.

Narumi sighed that thoughtful sigh of his that usually meant he was thinking of something really interesting and demonic. He made a show of thinking deeply, hands on his chin and pacing through the little space that the new crowd afforded him, before smiling broadly (another hint at his demonic intentions) and clapping in dismissal. "Of course it's fine! Naturally we'd have to inform the academy officials, but they'd let them in and I'm sure it wouldn't be a problem."

Then he turned towards the class, and Natsume felt a familiar wave of fear and anticipation that he had come to associate with Narumi and his Alice-

_"You will all be nice and accommodate them, right?"_

_Oh, gods, no, not the fuckin' Pheromone Alice, gods damn this life-_

"Yes, Narumi-sensei!" Polka Dots' obnoxious squeal broke through the spell that Narumi's voice cast, but her agreement was just as binding as saying yes to the asshole teacher's plea.

He grunted and leaned against the chair. Great. Just great.

* * *

They met them quickly enough. The first four - Annie Leonhardt, Bertholdt Fubar, Reiner Braun, and Jean Kirschwhatever - seemed okay to Natsume. The girl, Annie, might have freaked him out a bit at first, but there was something neutral about her personality, and that was just fine. The Reiner dude seemed really okay too, and the Bert guy looked a bit like Yuu. He had a little issue with the Kirshbleah guy, though, but he seemed easy to ignore so no problems about that.

The problem came with the next four. How _fuckin'_ grand.

The next one, a bald guy who looked just about as sharp as Mikan, cried out, "I am Connie Springer!", saw Koko's PSP, and then sprung to Koko's side and started talking about the whatever it was idiots talked about when it came to twenty-first century gaming.

Then came another blonde girl with blue eyes that could give Ruka a run for his money, except -

"My name is Armin Arlert, pleasure to meet you all."

- _she _was actually a fuckin' _he_. And if the Bert guy looked like Yuu, this guy _was_ Yuu stripped of the backbone and the spectacles, and Natsume has yet to decide whether that should creep him out or amaze him when the last guy stepped up, put a fist to his heart in an awkward kind of salute, and screamed his salutations.

"Eren Jaeger, member of the 104th Trainees Squad and initiate of the Scouting Legion, currently serving under Lance Corporal Ravaille, at your service!"

This little speech rendered everyone, including Natsume, speechless. Really? What the fuck was that about? For a moment, Natsume felt a slight tug at his eyebrows. All his confusion was dispelled, however, when the girl beside the Eren dude smacked him upside the head and said, "Mikasa Ackerman. Can't say the same as this idiot."

Natsume's head spun into a sickening mess that prodded him into speaking his thoughts out loud.

"Oh gods, not another heartless female, for fuck's sakes."

It might just have been his life's greatest mistake.


	2. Eren

Eren couldn't quite believe his eyes, and that says a lot. He's watched so many friends getting killed and swallowed and dismembered by enormous asshats that smiled for no reason and that _chased after people for the sake of eating them_, and he himself had his fair share of transformations that drove him nuts most of the time, but meeting that Natsume Hyuuga - or hearing him call Mikasa "another heartless female" - gave him a paradigm shift so terrible that he actually had to facepalm to get all the wonder out.

He heard Mikasa talk from behind him. "What did you call me?" Her words were followed by the rush of clothes and the quiet, catlike footsteps that meant she was probably planning on beheading the dude right then and there. In a rush of clarity, he looked up from his palm and held Mikasa's wrists into place. "Mikasa, stop."

She glanced at him long and hard and _angrily_, as if asking him _Why not_? And he honestly couldn't see why not but he couldn't see why either so... "No," he breathed out again. "Just... no."

Quite abruptly he heard the sounds of a chair scraping the floor and a black-haired female with the same cold eyes as Mikasa, holding a gun in one hand and a small smile on her face (which he wouldn't have seen if not for the fact that he's seen it from Mikasa countless of times before). The girl looked quietly amused and amazed.

"Allow me," she told them, before facing the dude's direction and firing the gun.

Panic flooded through him for a few moments before realising that the dude had actually managed to avoid the gunfire, but Mikasa seemed content with seeing the discomfited boy jump from the wall and back to his chair. Without further ado, his childhood friend walked all the way towards the black-haired girl's side and sat down.

Which left him with nowhere else to sit in but beside the brown-haired girl with a big smile on her face. He inquired quietly through a pleading gaze, which she understood in a trice. She smiled wider - Eren didn't think that was possible, but it was - and said, "You can sit beside me, Eren-kun."

Gratefully he rushed towards her and sat down, and eventually got dragged into an easy, happy conversation about where he came from and what he did, which was normally not "happy" per se, but she made it sound so _okay_ and it wasn't hard to be around her. And if ever he got random parts of him suddenly catching fire, he'd just brush it off as a side-effect of the time-dimension travel, and it was fine.


End file.
